Jules Verne's Three Laws of Automata

A homunculus, automaton or other artificial being;

  1. shall not serve a human red wine with fish.
  2. must always alert a human to shortfallings in the quality of his cuisine with a mechanical cry of 'sacré bleu'.
  3. shall not (through inaction) allow a human to be seen in public with mismatching gaiters and cravatte.

–Kim Newman