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--- hosting_craft [2013-12-19 16:09] – [Session 4: The conversations] maja
+++ hosting_craft [2014-05-07 09:34] – [Session 4: The conversations] maja
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-Next time (January 2014): 'Harvesting': note taking and summarising, with a side note on listening and public speaking.
+Next time (April 2014): 'Harvesting': note taking and summarising, with a side note on listening and public speaking.
+==== Listening and summarising ====
+While the participants are 'conversing' one of the most important roles of the host is to listen and summarise conversations, find overarching patterns and distill the essence of the discussions.
+=== Listening ===
+A few notes on [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Active_listening|Active Listening]]
+== Comprehension ==
+  * understanding what the other person is saying.
+  * shared meaning, language, jargon issues
+== Retaining ==
+  * memory: related to making meaning (memory fills in the blanks - 'kunstendecreet', 'slacktivism'
+  * different memories, different meanings attached to the same statement
+We can’t retain everything we hear, several reasons:
+  * cramming: a lot of info at the same time stored in short term memory, then purged
+  * not paying attention to what is being said
+  * not finding something important - looses meaning
+  * lack motivation to better remember what is being said: using info immediately after it was received increases our ability to retain information
+== Responding ==
+  * if in an interaction (conversation rather than lecture), you’re required to respond, it makes your listening more active
+  * mindless listening <-> mindful (active) listening
+== Active listening ==
+  * both words and non-verbal signals (body language)
+  * hearing, then restating/paraphrasing what has been heard in your own words/language
+Barriers:
+  * distractions (physical - sounds, visual…)
+  * trigger words
+  * vocabulary
+  * limited attention span
+  * making assumptions based on our own experience, rather than really listening
+  * conversational narcissism, shift response - listen to what someone says, then turning the conversation to you without showing interest whether the others are listening, or whether what you’re saying is continuing/diverting the conversational flow
+  * support response - opposite of shift response: focus conversational attention to the other person, encourages cooperation (remember compass) - not me-oriented but we-oriented
+What to do:
+  * put personal emotions aside
+  * ask clarifying questions
+  * paraphrase and repeat to make sure you understand
+  * try to overcome all environmental distractions
+  * not judging or arguing prematurely (holding onto a personal opinion)
+  * eye contact (in most EU cultures) and appropriate body language (mirroring, or middle position)
+  * empathise, try to listen from within the others’ shoes
+  * intonation and stressing particular words can keep listeners from being distracted
+<blockquote>Exercise: In pairs: one person speaks, the other(s) listen, ask questions, repeat/paraphrase at the end, check if correct. What to talk about? Describe a painful situation/conflict/dilemma you’re currently faced with </blockquote>
+=== Summarising ===
+i.e. Restating main ideas of a conversation in as few words as possible. Summary is like a quilt that pulls together very different pieces of fabric
+In a summary the host takes what everyone has said into account, distills essential points in a concise and clear language. It's important to pay attention to what kind of information you’re summarising (is it describing the context, is it a call for action, opinions, answers to questions), especially if there are 'next steps' to be done. Always end by asking if people agree with your summary, if they have something to add, if something is unclear or if you misunderstood something - "did I get it right, did i get it all?" By the end of the summary, people should have a sense of closure, that the discussion is rounded up and there isn’t more to be said.
+A good summary:
+  * uses the words of the speaker so they maintain ownership of what is said
+  * enables an overview of the discussion/situation that is played back to the group, using their own words as much as possible
+  * finds the essence in the jungle of words and opinions
+  * no advice, opinion or re-interpretation
+  * it doesn’t have to be perfect - it allows the group to reflect on whether you understood correctly - and if not, maybe others didn’t either…
+  * it gives the speakers a chance to 'hear themselves' as they have been heard - they can review their thoughts and feelings from a more detached position
+  * sees things as a whole, when all the details, distractions, emotions… are removed
+  * ensures clear communication
+== How to structure summaries ==
+Be short and to the point, keep in mind what the topic or the question of the conversation is and find a words to pull together possible answers/clear descriptions.
+Begin with a statement that shows that you’re summarising:
+  * let me see if i understand so far…
+  * here’s what i’ve heard, let me know if i’m missing something
+  * let me see if i have all of this…
+  * we’re coming to a close and i’d like to try to pull together what we said, to see where we are and where we’re going…
+If there are different opinions or options, make sure to include them all
+  * on the one hand… while on the other…
+  * at the same time…
+  * and…
+End with an open question:
+  * what else?
+  * what other points are there to consider?
+When to summarise?
+  * at transition points
+  * in between sessions
+  * when changing topics
+  * to wrap up a session
+  * in the beginning and/or end of the day
+<blockquote>Exercise: pick a range of different videos of speeches, lectures, TED / PechaKucha talks, interviews and debates. Watch and listen to them, take notes and verbally summarise what you heard. Try getting a very different range of people and topics: from politics, science, culture, activism... and if you speak different languages, try it out with a few different ones as well</blockquote>
+=== Impromptu public speaking ===
+When summarising, you usually don’t have time to prepare a considered speech (unless the workshop spreads across multiple days, and you summarise the previous day in the morning - which you should always try to do). If it is possible to find some time to consider your words, that’s great, If not - a few things to keep in mind when you’re trying to be persuasive/holding people’s attention (Suggestions from [[http://www.hks.harvard.edu/about/faculty-staff-directory/marie-danziger/%28page%29/faculty|Marie Danziger]]:
+A speech has 3 elements, and so does a summary:
+  * logos (content and structure)
+  * pathos (emotional impact)
+  * ethos (personal credibility and likeability)
+(all three depend on the audience’s sensitivity)
+Logos:
+  * keep it simple and easy to remember
+  * establish common ground
+  * think about what might be objections and counter arguments
+Pathos:
+  * acknowledge your audience’s values and feelings
+  * share your own feelings and reactions
+  * use striking facts and contrasts
+  * be personal and visual
+Ethos:
+  * show that you care
+  * acknowledge the colour of your lens
+  * use examples
+  * refer to people
+  * be real and interactive
+<blockquote> Exercise: Have a casual group conversation about a topic of your choice. For example:
+  * how does your life change with your children on school holidays
+  * what does climate chaos and unpredictable weather conditions impact your life?
+  * how do you deal with exhaustion?
+  * what could we work on together?
+  * etc.
+Each host-in-training should have a chance to listen and summarise, so you should have as many rounds as hosts. Make the conversations 5-10 minutes long, then have the host summarise. Discuss the delivery and content of the summary together (did the host capture the gist of the conversation? was the summary helpful to make sense of what was discussed? what was the delivery of the summary like (think about logos, pathos, ethos)? etc...) Then move to the next conversation, until all hosts had their turn. </blockquote>
+Next session (20140612 at 2PM): Graphic Harvesting/Recording